just to get it out of my system....

for a while i had been thinking a lot of something that one of my friends said....well about 2 things....one of them, mothers day and the other is why we mothers talk a LOT about our kids....

Many of us think that is a little odd to have "a day" to remember our mothers or fathers, etc, especially because year by year it has increasingly become so commercialized....

I call my mother every week, for almost everything....that is maybe to much, but its me....so it make me wonder about the other side...yes, how many times we truly remember to great our family our friends, if not for this "dates in our calendars"........ the people who maybe call them once a year, or on woman's day, or anniversaries, or earth day, or for mothers day, like when the wife remind her husband to sign a card to his mother (i saw this on a movie-so maybe its not true, specially if the wife remind her husband about her "mother in law"-90% of married couples are not fond about their in-laws) and he asked: this is for what??? and she said, its her birthday!.....and yes again, it can happen, our busy lives dont let us communicate much with our family or friends, it is never like when we were in school or college days.....we dont gather together and sing songs, or recite poems......not everybody, but at least a lot of us forget about it....

so for some of us it is great to have "a day" to remind us about some special person we leave beside, to reconcile with our beloved for some stupid fight, a day to remember we live on planet earth and we have to take care of it, because is our home, a day to cheer us up and tell us we are important.....yea, yea, we should always know we are important, but for some people, even just one, if you create just one smile on her, we are creating a chain of greatness.....have you hear about depression???, yes, those who had fight with it know how deep in the dark can you get, so terrible and so lonely we dont have anything to live for.....

so, for me, yes...give me dates to help me be more compassionate, to take more care, to say I LOVE YOU, to say I AM SORRY, i miss you, you are wonderful, you are worthed.....a date to stop me from running and take care of simple and most important things in life.....

and my same friend also said this on a facebook comment:

"i really cant understand how pregnant women can only talk about pregnancy and mothers of a new-born child only talk about that child...but well...that's life with its imperfections and aspects one simple does not always grasp...."

and i added this:

"i guess in my case i am just surrounding by girls with babies and i expend so much time in the park or something baby relates like "mom in touch group" that there is no much time for anything else...for know...i hope...we are in this mysterious word of tantrums, potty training, foods allergies, colic, fears, sleeping problems like i didnt know if babies are tired they just cry and cry and cry....i thought they will just shut their eyes and that is it!...and hundred of many surprises.....so maybe we feel so dumb and helpless that a little (or lot) of talking may help....especially when you hear that somebody else baby has the same problem...it sounds bad, but as i said you feel connected or find some kind of understanding...."

and it make me thinking again....in how awful i can sound talking a talking about my kids and their poops or else......and i can said know that it can be the same even between parents, when they said: "my little one change her clothes all by herself", so a nonparent person will think: "arent all kids change their clothes, what is she so happy about???" or think..." yea, right, but we weren't talking about the climate changes???....a parent of a 4 year old may think "at what age my daughter change by herself, sooner for sure..." a parent of same age kid will say "mine talks 10 words in two languages!!!"..yea, that will be me....shame on me.....but we all parents are like that.......(again a feeling of relief.....)

it also remind me when armando and i were living on ireland (childrenless) and he will get so annoying about the kids screaamming and crying on the bus...he said to me: "can i take one of them and throw it out the window"....but you should see him know....how much he loves to play with his children, and other children...just like another little one....

i remember with my first baby i expend all my extra time reading about babies, books and books and on internet.....and i should said it help me a lot.....like when my emily start her terrible twos and throw herself to the floor backwards hitting her head...can you non-parent imagine that????, yes, i was all open mouth running for information on my little "cave man".....then i found it can get even worse, those little critters can bite themselves, scratch their faces and else........like my cousin reminded me of one of the many things i did/or said: she told me i use to said:" if you hit me, i will pee!!!!".......oh God, i guess i have nothing to complain about my kids.....

play time!!!

after lots of raining days...it was time for the sun to come and visit Lincoln, we where close to 90 F the past weekend!!!...so we decided to go some place with water after taking sophie to the doctor's office....yes, again, sophie got some fever since Thursday afternoon, she was feeling moody and tired, and just few minutes after we arrived at home and changed her clothes, she falled sleep on daddys arms, she was 102 degrees, i opened her mouth for some medicine, she didnt had the straight to fight it.....next day was worse, she was almost all day on my arms, fussy and just not being herself....the nurse over the phone told me to watch her 24 h and see if she develops any other symptom, like runny nose or something, if i cannot see anything i had to take her to the doctor.....by saturday morning she woke up without fever, but by 10 am it began again......so i call the office and got her for 2:30 pm....we went out to eat and from then to the doctors office....
emily performed for daddy as she waited for her sister.....
luckily sophie had just some virus at he back of her throat and didnt need antibiotics....just wait few days and it will go away.....i just need to watch out for emily because it was contagious, and they like to share everything, even germs....






in the city center has been lot of construction for the Antelope valley project, this is an amazing path for bicycles and pedestrians to walk trough, basically made for flood control, it has been designed to contain ponds, fountains, pools, benches, sculptures, lamps, parks, as amenities....i always watch it after taking armando to work, so i was dying to get trough and enjoy it!....it is really great! or it is going to be cause it is not complete yet and there is still a lot of dirt around and the water didnt look nice to play around....so we have to keep the girls out of them, specially sophie!




















It was nap time for sophie, but yeah! right.....she fight it to keep going!

we went to the park close by and play a little bit on the grass and on the playground, the greatest thing about this park is the fountain in the middle of the park, lots of kids come to play in a sunny day.....but it wasnt working yet......something different is the structure of the play things, there are "modern"......pretty but odd.....like in the picture of emily, i guess that was a "horse"....i havent seen much kids over that thing....






luckily they couldnt change the swings so the girls always have great fun on them!!!!!

Sophie likes to practice her songs.....

one is in spanish, un elefante se balanceaba sobre la tela de una arania..(one elephant swing on a web...),

so she use her fingers for number one and to play spider as in the itsy bitsy spider song.....then we say in spanish: como veia q resistia...(as we see it was strong...),

she cover her eyes because in the video where she saw that song, the kids use their hand as glasses.....

then we play another song that a little nine year old did teach me on the park when emily was just 2 years old....

it is something like this: one for the money, two for the act, three for the people and four we gooooo!!!, so we push 3 times and the fourth we go really hard, and she love it! as emily did!

when the night came she was so tired.....still woke up 3-4 times for the fever and for the heat, she was sweating so much i had to shower her on powder....

On sunday we went to play to an indoor playground, "lost in fun", and emily help to get sophie on her socks.....but most of the times sophie will shake her feet so much that emily finish asking for my help.....

sophie really enjoyed every place in the playground!, the bubbles, the balls, more swings, a tunnel, and the sponges...she reaaaly liked the sponges...she even through herself in there after watching emily......

at the beginning she was a little scare because the place it is quite dark, but after she got confident, she could get in and out without help! it was really cute how she will scream (like emily) before jumping!....

and as always, they will finish up with us, and next day our old bodys will feel like a trunk pass over us.....and they will be, they will be so fresh and ready to start all over again!....but tomorrow is going to be Monday, a day to work and to go to school.....so i will get a peacefully one complete hour during sophie's nap time.....sooo looking forward to it!

uffff...

i can believe it has been a month since i blogged! time goes fast, so fast i just celebrate sophie's first year, yesterday!, it was a great party, with our best and closest friends...i know sophie is almost one year and a half by now, but i couldn't just let it go, she is my baby too, and even if she is just growing on her sisters clothes, toys, dishes, etc, i had to do her a party too!...but lets face it, beeing a second child socks! ...... emily had like 8 video tapes by her first birthday and thousands of pictures, sophie just has just one completed tape and it could be ilegal to buy her more clothes or toys, she has sooooo much from emily that she hardly wears them all.....

anyway, i have been postponing this party for "n" reasons, armando's many job interviews, me dont wanting to do cleaning, emily and sophie's health problems, me been sick too, etc.....it doesnt look like i did much but cleaning it is a big deal right now, emily has been coughing since we came back, that it is already two months and a half, just once or twice a day dry cough...armando's friends got to her a big stuff dolphin, after playing in a carnival, it was emilys best friend for a long time, even sophie got to enjoy it, everybody play jumping on that poor animal that my mum saw almost all over trying to keep his insides in....when we came back to lincoln the jumping didnt stop till it broke on the side, then sophie found it a start having her own "snow shower", i think it was filled with technopore, different sizes of that blast all over our bed....it was really fun for sophie, and i should have taken a picture but i was in panic mode for how much cleaning i had to do......i sew it myself and a week later i trough it away cause there was a white dust coming out of it and i thought that maybe the cause of emily's persistent cough..... i wait for any positive reaction but nothing change, actually i got sick and a couple of weeks later she start coughing even more, so now she was really sick.....

after a week the coughing got worse and i took her directly to an asthma clinic at her pediatrician, i dont really get this asthma thing, it is well know that in Peru we get too much antibiotics or medicine in general for simple things like just cold, so when sophie was also coughing and getting sick every month i got scare and follow the doctors recommendation on giving her asthma medicine.....i dont know it was really a good move...no wait, it was good because she got better in few days, i am just still afraid of steroids...in peru emily got sick just once during our five months stay....after a week emily got sick, the doctor give her some pills (asthma pills, no steroids) and told me if she didnt get better really fast take her again to the office cause she will probably need steroids......after 3 days the really bad cough slow down and started to sound more like a normal one but her sister got sick too, so i took them both to the see the doctors, just in case...sophies doctor told me that she was fine just with a normal cold, and something very important: NOT EVERY COLD DEVELOPS INTO ASTHMA SYMPTOMS"....i got relieve.....and for emilys case, it seems she was getting better but developing a sinus infection, so she needed antibiotics for 2 weeks....

the two weeks are gone, she looks great, but still coughing once or twice every single night....why????, really.....why????...

could be the detergent.....i change from powder to liquid.....nothing change yet, but it hasnt been that much time....could it be the books and boxes......i am doing a big cleaning up, reaaaaly big one.....and it is taking all my time.....and after i will be or washing the carpet or moving somewhere else.....and the problem is where?...i will be moving soon somewhere for armando's job?, how much longer are we going to stay in lincoln?...isnt it the health of emily most important than anything?......that really gives me headaches.....

one day i want to move and the next it fells like it is not the best idea, with all the things i need to pack!, our friends, and just for maybe 6 months???? it is really killing me....

and for the cherry on the cake (or something like that...) i am having bad thoughts....i am thinking it willl be good for me to get a job....emotionally speaking......maybe it is just hormonal and it will go away....ja, ja!...or maybe it is just me, when i have a problem, i just have to make it really reaaally big, and kill myself trying to resolve it.....i guess i really need a job to keep me busy......other kind of busy if you know what i mean..... and as always, i am up to the challenge, but i think i am getting to old for the game....